Erection Problems? - We Can Help!
No blue pills, no awful side effects, just long lasting results. Your Initial Consultation and First Treatment are COMPLETELY FREE

Sex Talk: How to Talk About Sex With Your Partner

Sex Talk How to Talk About Sex With Your Partner

If you want to have satisfactory sex, you need to be able to talk about sex. But for many couples, this is easier said than done.

While the modern world is filled with countless sexually-suggestive material—from music videos to subtle behaviors—it’s not the easiest thing to weave into daily chatter.

Each couple will also have their preferences and boundaries when it comes to discussing sex (although the average tends to fall at around once a week). 

A satisfying sex life takes into consideration your partner’s feelings, so make sure you’re on the same page with that as much as possible.

Here are some tips on how to discuss sex and sexual preferences.

1. Know What Topics to Discuss Before Speaking

When it comes to sex, there are a lot of different things you can discuss. Whether it’s discussing your sexual fantasies, communicating about birth control, or simply sharing your likes and dislikes in bed, it’s important to know what you want to talk about before bringing up the topic with your partner.

This can help the conversation maintain a sense of purpose while also giving you ample time to know what to say. Sex talks—especially for couples who haven’t mustered up the courage to talk about it yet—can be draining and involve lots of complex emotions that have yet to surface. 

Reflect on what you want first (preferably with the help of a licensed professional) before talking with your partner.

One more thing is that it’s important to keep the conversation focused and short at the start. Once you and your partner become more comfortable, you can continue talking about ways to improve your sex life.

2. Consider Your Partner’s Expectations and Needs

talking about sex consider partner's expectations needs topics

It’s important to consider your partner’s needs and expectations when it comes to sex. After all, sex is a two-person activity.

Talk about what kinds of sexual activity you’re both comfortable with, and be sure to ask your partner what they like and don’t like. Both sides should be excited about the prospect of having sex—any less than that and you should be considering a different activity!

If you feel that your partner’s low sex drive is vastly different from yours, feel free to discuss it openly with them. Don’t coerce them into having sex or touch them suggestively if they are against it.

Similarly, if you feel that your sex drive is lower than your partner’s, you may bring it up with a sexual health specialist. Men can experience a decrease in sex drive as they age as a result of health concerns and stress. Fortunately, there are ways to improve your performance again.

If you feel that your sex drive has diminished, get checked by a sex therapist for erectile dysfunction.

3. Discuss STIs for Safe Sex

Ever questioned if it’s the right etiquette to discuss STIs with your new partner? Rest assured— it’s perfectly normal.

If you’re worried that your partner has STIs, encourage them to get checked by a clinic. You never know; they might be carrying viruses from previous sexual encounters.

The way to approach the topic may feel daunting, but all you have to do is be direct and relaxed. You don’t have to make it sound overly complicated. Opening it up in a relaxed and calm manner will communicate the same sense of ease to them, thus reducing any tension that may arise from the conversation.

Many STIs can be asymptomatic, including:

  1. Chlamydia
  2. Gonorrhea
  3. Herpes
  4. Human papillomavirus (HPV)
  5. Trichomoniasis

Before talking to your partner, ensure you’re not unknowingly spreading any diseases as well. Both you and your partner deserve to have a pleasant sexual experience with no risks.

If you have STDs, don’t feel ashamed or guilty about it. There are many people with STIs, and as long as you disclose it to your partner, you can open up the conversation on how to navigate your sexual desires while maintaining a healthy relationship.

4. Know What Topics You Shouldn’t Bring Up

In the same vein that you shouldn’t sport flip-flops and shorts to a cocktail party, you shouldn’t bring up sex in certain situations either.

While you may have pure intentions, your partner may not be in the mood to discuss the matter. It’s important to inform your partner beforehand that you’ll be talking about sex.

Here are moments where you should not start talking about sex:

  • During, before, or immediately after sex
  • When they’re stressed, hungry, or tired
  • The moment they arrive

It’s never a bad idea to remind them that you want to talk about sex ahead of time. This way, they won’t be shocked or anxious when you open up the topic.

For ideas, try something like “I really like us to discuss something regarding our sex life later. Is tonight a good time?” This way, you don’t come across as confrontational while still having an agenda in mind.

5. Discuss Suggestions Instead of Complaints

Many people think that complaining about their sex life is the same as offering constructive criticism, but it’s not. When you complain, you’re putting your partner on the defensive and making them feel like they’re doing something wrong. Instead of complaining, try suggesting ways to make things better.

For example, if you wish your partner to do something more often, here are things you can consider saying:

  • “I think it would be hot if we start with foreplay. Wouldn’t you agree?”
  • “I’d like us to keep up this frequency. Would that be OK?”
  • “This position is fun, but maybe we should try this position next time. What do you think?”

As it’s an invitation, don’t always expect them to answer the way you want them to. Respect their preference, and never ever attack them for something they would rather do (or not do) in bed.

Consult Cincinnati’s Leading Men’s Clinic for a Sexual Health Consultation

Consult Cincinnati’s Leading Men’s Clinic for a Sexual Health Consultation

Sex talk can be a difficult topic to navigate, especially if you’re new to the scene. It requires patience, understanding, and empathy towards your partner and yourself.

However, at its core, it’s fun for a reason! Once you and your partner get in the groove, your sex life will be nothing short of a blissful experience.

Have sexual health concerns you need to get addressed? Contact a doctor at Proactive Men’s Medical Center in Cincinnati for a consultation. Our concierge approach positions your unique case at the centerpoint of our focus. We don’t just give you a pill for ED and send you on your way. We treat the underlying issues that led to each sexual health condition. We are Cincinnati’s leading men’s clinic providing ED therapy, PE therapy, Acoustic Wave therapy, hormone therapy, and much more.

What Causes Loss of Erection During Sex?

Sex—we all enjoy it in one way or another. But what if during the crucial moment when you need it the most, you’re unable to sustain the action? Believe it or not, this phenomenon is pretty common. It doesn’t make it any less disconcerting…

How to Get Sensation Back: 5 Simple Methods

Do you no longer feel pleasure during sex or masturbation? Is your penis failing to become erect, even if you’re mentally and sexually aroused? Are you experiencing a sharp and sudden decreased interest in sex? If your penis sensitivity is preventing you from having…

How Hypothyroidism Causes Low Testosterone

Some may have never heard of hypothyroidism throughout their lives, but this condition is more common in the world we live in than many expect. In fact, approximately 5% of the global population suffers from some kind of hypothyroidism. Hypothyroidism is a condition wherein…

Hormone Replacement Therapy: 6 Powerful Benefits for Men

Ever have those days where your cravings flare up unexpectedly, or you’re feeling out of sorts for no apparent reason? In case you’re wondering why you’re feeling these frustrating mood fluctuations, you can blame your hormones for it. Hormones—the primary chemical messengers of the…

How to Cure Venous Leakage (6 Treatment Options)

Erectile dysfunction is the bane of any sexually active man. It can cause great distress to them and their partners, severely limiting the sexual component of a relationship. Erectile dysfunction, being a highly prevalent disease, can be classified under different subtypes. This is due…

8 Libido Boosters That Work for Men

A loving partner would do anything to please their significant other. But if your body and sexual organs fail to cooperate with you, satisfying your partner may feel more like a chore than something mutually pleasurable. This is especially true if you have sexual…

How Low Testosterone Affects Blood Sugar In Men

Are you experiencing a lack of coordination, chills, clammy skin, and sweating? If you haven’t been screened for any other conditions, you may have low blood sugar levels. Blood sugar, or glucose, is a key cellular energy source. When glucose levels fall below 70…

Neurogenic Bladder: Symptoms, Diagnosis & Treatment

Have you found it increasingly difficult to get your bladder under control? Do you find yourself relieving yourself in times you least expect it? We hear you. Experiences like this can be a struggle, especially if you’re already dealing with other health conditions on…

Hydrocele: Causes, Symptoms, and Treatment

A hydrocele is an accumulation of fluid in a sac surrounding the testicle. Most commonly experienced by newborns, it’s usually not painful and goes away on its own within the first year of life. In some cases, though, older adults may develop a hydrocele,…

Urine Color: What It Says About Male Health

While not as vibrant as the colors of the rainbow, urine can appear in different colors based on a variety of factors, such as your diet and certain medications. For most healthy people, urine will often switch between different shades of yellow, from pale…

How Pelvic Floor Disorders Affect Sexual Health

Pelvic floor disorders refer to health conditions that may occur when the muscles and tissues supporting the pelvic organs—such as the bladder, uterus, and rectum—become frail or injured. Considering the proximity of the pelvic floor to our reproductive organs, these disorders may exacerbate and…
Proudly Featured On
ESPN Radio logo
ABC News logo
Fox News Radio logo
CBS Sports Radio logo
NBC Sports Radio logo